Holly the Hut

This is the elephant font.  It is appropriate for my mood and how I look and feel. I’m avoiding the beach so that someone doesn’t try to save me lol.  And I’m only half joking.  How did I let it get this bad that I’m winded walking like 50 feet from my car to the building inside.  I pretend to check my cell phone just to take a quick break and catch my breath.  WTF!

OMG I’m like those that peeps make fun of on The Biggest Loser or My 600 Pound Life who cry about every damn thing.  Have you seen those shows?  My 600 Pound Life especially.  You see them not get out of bed ever bitching about it while they eat fried chicken.  But I’m EXACTLY the same way, just the situation is a little different.

It’s so annoying because I really want to get healthy, but I really want to eat the food I like.  Why is that hunger/urge so very powerful.  Why do I LET it be so powerful.

Like of course I want to have another kid instead of stuff my face with cake, but apparently not because why would I do it then?

For lunch today I had a Lean Cuisine, trying to have good intentions etc, but then there was leftover cake in the breakroom and of course I dug in and later even bought a candy bar from the vending machine.

It’s really annoying.

So here is what I’m going to do.  Adam and I after we exercise at night (oh yeah we are gonna do that too lol), we are going to plan out our healthy food for the next day.  We do have to wait until we get paid to go shopping lol.

OMG just worked out.  I thought I would last 2 minutes.  I lasted 10 lol.  Hard to be proud of that, but I am.  Hey you gotta start somewhere.

Sorry to be such a downer.  This is what I feel like lately.  I know I have a lot of blessings.  Just need to conquer this.