Fat & Fabulous

Diary of a Fat Woman

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

 

*Funny People

• Max & Hailey: They keep pretending to be puppies. I'm throwing them pretend bones & petting their precious heads the other day when suddenly they both simultaneously lift up their (hind) leg and make a pee sound. Oh I nearly lost it (Laurie was pretty upset when she saw it later, understandably so but dear me still makes me laugh to think of it. Why is it so damn funny when kids are naughty?)
  
• Hailey: So on my birthday (last Friday-May 28^th), my niece that now lives with me says with a huge wide grin…."Happy Birthday Holly………you have a big butt!" Oh my stars I was laughing so hard! Hailey I will so tease you about that one day.
  
• Hailey (AGAIN!): Yeah Hailey IS the comedy section this time-go Hailey! So I'm helping her on the potty (basically because she is 3 years old and tiny that she would fall in the toilet if you didn't hold her up she would fall inside and probably get flushed away) and she says I have a big tummy and after a closer inspection says "Wow, you big all over Holly." While I was trying to regain my composure she asks inquisitively "Why you so big Holly?" And you could tell she just honestly wanted to know! Why are people so big? I'm racking my brain as to the appropriate response for her age, like 'well I eat too many twinkies' or something like that and then she says "Oh I know………did you drink too much water?" And I quickly said "Yes, that's it exactly!"
  

  
   

  Ah hell I'm gonna be a terrible mother! (I did tell Laurie so she could tell her the truth lol)
  

  
   

*Not Another Fad Diet – the Ugly Truth

Well I'm still determined to beat this! I refuse to get up, oh whoops I meant give up! Lol. That actually really was a typo but perhaps that's my problem lol (or at least one of the many)

Fast and Furious

So yeah my last endeavor to diet was the 6 week body makeover. I can't begin to tell you how excited I was about this diet! I was determined to make it work and bought it and read the whole program and well, the long and the short of it is that I lasted THREE WEEKS.

Fight Club

I think I learned something though. It has to be a life change. I just can't stick to something really restrictive. I was caught in a pickle. On one hand, I couldn't be patient enough to lose it slowly - the right way. I wanted to do something where I saw faster results to keep me going. The problem with losing it slow is just that. It's so damn slow. Hard to get all excited about a pound when you are nearly 400 pounds. Just sayin……

So here are my new guidelines:

• Drink 100 ounces water daily
  
• 6 small meals-mostly protein & vegetables (less carbs)
  

I'LL KEEP YOU UPDATED!

 

*The Family Stone

It has been a wild and crazy ride lately!

The Graduate

So this year Nick (Adam's brother) and Briana (my niece) are graduating. Congrats you guys! Sadly their presents have not yet arrived-ugh. So sorry!

BTW can't they do something to speed these things up a little? Can't they just run or something? Does the principal really have to talk for an hour? Could there be more entertainment-Jugglers? Clowns? Feed the drop-outs to lions? SOMETHING PLEASE! And attention people who are speaking-please don't google graduation speeches and use the first few good quotes-WE'VE HEARD THEM ALREADY!

Bride Wars

Oh wow! So many weddings! Yeah. I could write a novel about how complicated planning a wedding can be! Congrats to all the newlyweds:

• Alisa (cousin)
  
• Rachel (cousin)
  
• Me & Adam
  
• Jen (sister) & Chad
  
• Stephanie (ex-step sister)
  
• Megan & Tom (engaged)
  

And there are more on Adam's side! Craziness. Adam and I like to think we started a trend!

Wild Things

Ok seriously the most exciting thing (well you know besides wedding DUH) is that Laurie moved in! I love Max & Hailey (nephew & niece) and they are a DELIGHT to live with. They play games with us and have the cutest imaginations ever. And yeah, can't say no to them (again-I'm so gonna be a bad mom-the pushover kind)

The Great Outdoors

Over Memorial Day we had our big bash up at Milcreek Canyon.

The highlights:

• Dad hiking with us, moaning the whole way (kudos to you dad)
  
• Watching the kids play with the bubble wands we (Adam & I) got them
  
• We have almost as many dogs as kids now (makes me want one-I so want a Rhodesian Ridgeback one day)
  

  
   

*Much Ado About Nothing

Randomness….

Knocked Up

Ok facebook friends, it was an error in judgement to post anything about pregnancy. And just to clarify again, no I'm NOT pregnant…..I just LOOK like I am pregnant. I look like I'm pregnant in the belly-actually both bellies, and in my ass. Triplets maybe?

Endless Love

Can I just say I have the most patient man in the entire world? I love him so much, even though he doesn't know how to shut cupboards or put dirty clothes in the hamper. I think my list of annoying habits is so much longer!!!! God bless you Adam.

35 Going on 25

Yeah I had a birthday again. Damn can't Adam start looking older? Well I decided I'm 25 now, not 35. Sounds so much better to me. All those in favor? Good!

Rat Race

Work smirk. I can't even think about it right now. J I do love my job, just super busy lately! I am really grateful for it!