Sometimes you have to do some real
soul-searching to figure out what you really want.
I think I sabotage myself,
especially when I’ve been doing really good – I use whatever excuse possible to
(expletive) it all up.
It’s hard being a giant blob
lol. But the worst part is that it is
all your own fault. I mean it is
literally. No one to blame but yourself and
Dunkin’ Donuts (jk they don’t FORCE you to eat their donuts or anything). Like my Grandma used to say “You ate it!”
So you can imagine how hard it is
to think positive about yourself sometimes.
I mean I do. I think I am a good Mom and a good person, but obviously I have
control issues. I’ve let food get the
best of me and that is a big weakness and I hate weaknesses. I’m not saying I hate myself sheesh.
I think I just need to understand
better that I deserve to be happy! I deserve this.
I want to feel better about
myself. I want to be more happy and
healthy. I want to not have to worry
about seats I can’t fit into and trying to find clothes my size.
1 comments:
Love you, holly:) you are not the circumstances surrounding you. You are an unbelievable light that has helped so many, including me. What would have ever done without you all those years ago in Tejas:) ? Hidden under my covers, that's for sure.
You need to find some peace, wherever that may be. (though I do have a suggestion:)) you'll find it if you remember who you are.
Miss you do much.
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