Fall hard, rise HARDER

Oh shitballs, I hate writing when I’m like this.  I’d much rather lift people’s spirits or at least make them laugh at my silliness.  No one wants to be a ‘Debbie-Downer’! 

(Oh, my apologies to my dear sister-I guess you probably loathe that particular saying).

So I’ve just been an idiot nearly most of this weekend.  Here I had two extra days off and do I make the MOST out of them????  NO, I mope nearly MOST of the time.

Sure we went to the zoo and I’ve really enjoyed time with Sammi and Adam, but I have to be all sad-face sheesh!  There was so much more I wanted to do – projects and some fun things, but no I didn’t want to do anything but be miserable and feel sorry for myself.

I never do my hair or make-up anymore.  I’m just in a slump and I’m sick of feeling sorry for myself.  I got so bummed out reminiscing about the countless reality shows I’ve tried out for and just quit stuff.

WHY DO I DO THIS CONSTANTLY?  I’ll be doing great for a little bit and then I quit.  I gained 3.4 pounds.  So this is when I usually get more depressed and quit.  I’ve done this MILLIONS of times.

I can’t do it anymore.  The FAILING and QUITTING part of it.  Hopping right back on the wagon and not wasting any more valuable time.

And you know what, it’s okay!  I’m not perfect.  I will make mistakes in the future, but as long as I get right back up again, I will win the race in the end, right?  This time IS different.  Not because I will be perfect, but because I WILL NOT QUIT EVER.

This is hard shit – it really is.  But I just have to work hard and not give up.  Just keep going (just keep swimming, swimming, swimming).